Underwater Cookie

As I was swimming across what i taught was the end,
I realise my knees is shackled and bolted with steel as hot as fire.
There I was, beginning to question the end
As it would seems, I was conscious but everything was pitch black.
Something has happen or atleast I would say, something triggered within me.
I would explain it in words and yet the words escapes me.
I wonder what power is this.

Fear?
Realisation?
Weakness?

For some very awkward reason, that feeling attract me more and more
Its possible Im addicted.
Addicted to be that close to death.
Amazed I question myself
What is wrong with me?
What is happening to me.

Im starting to lose my sight and goals.
I already lost the unique and magnificent confidence I had. That very same confidence that Im on top of my game.
And now I couldn't even find the dice.

Questions after questions roll down in my head like a tsunami
The usual choice of running isn't an option anymore
Time to know whether I could swim or die.
Alone.

Sad eh? Fudge this shit. I need chocolate!